Performans je održan na pozornici HNK Varaždin u sklopu manifestacije Dani hrvatskog performansa, 2007.
Umjetnici, tj. Crtalić i ja, bili smo fizički odvojeni od publike, lišeni neposrednog kontakta s njom (i obratno). Sa laptopa u našoj prostoriji, projicirali smo slide show sastavljen od fotografija koje smo snimali proteklih pet godina, a koje se direktno ili indirektno tiču našeg odnosa, naše veze. U tome je bilo elemenata iznenađenja za nas oboje, jer bih ja donijela izbor iz svojih foto albuma, a on iz svojih, bez da smo se prethodno konzultirali o tome i bez da smo prethodno razmijenili mišljenja o tim fotografijama, te time nismo utjecali na neposrednost svojih reakcija na iste.
Same bi fotografije, kao vremenski isječci, trebale potaknuti sjećanja na neke događaje i terapeutski djelovati na naš odnos. Naime, mi smo imali mikrofone, i publika u dvorani je slušala naš dijalog dok razgledavamo svoje fotografije i rezmiramo taj segment naših života.
Performans je, tako, imao višestruko djelovanje, primarno na nas ’izvođače’ jer smo pred nepoznatom publikom, kao pred porotom, mogli održati javnu raspravu popraćenu dokumentacijom i pokušati razriješiti neke konflikte iz prošlosti; a sekundarno bi ’podučavao’ publiku gledanju performansa bez performera. Bio je to pokušaj izbjegavanja direktnog ogoljavanja (kao što je sama fizička prisutnost umjetnika u njegovom radu, ili nagost autora) koje mnogi poistovjećuju sa medijem performancea, te dati tom ogoljavanju (imanetnog svakom iskrenom umjetničkom djelu) suptilniji oblik, izlažući jedino ljubavnički diskurs neposrednosti tog medija i lišavajući publiku koreografije.
Treća strana priče bilo je snimanje događanja video kamerom smještenom u dnu dvorane,a čiji kadar je obuhvatio platno, projekciju i dio publike s leđa, a koja je dokumentirala dokumentirano, te time zatvorila sjećanje u sintagmu vječno ponavljajućeg iskustva koje prijeti da postane simboličko.
Parafraziranjem medija nijemog filma, koji u ovom slučaju nije samo nijem, nego i nepokretan, a kojem se naknadno udahnjuje život komentarima - samim činom performansa, izvršava se uživo, inače fiktivna, vremenska elipsa.
Oksimoron neizbježno nastaje u tom procesu. Potaknut vječito živim i vrckavim tokom svijesti inspirirane na osjećanje i komentiranje predočavanjem fotografija, koje su samo sačuvane milisekunde prošlosti, dakle, mrtvo tkivo trenutka u kojem se nalazimo, možemo prepoznati relativnost vremena i identiteta koje nam ono nameće, te odnosa koji proizlaze iz tih identiteta,a koji su jednako realni koliko i sama fotografska činjenica.
It was a performance piece, meant to be performed in cinema hall or similar place for video projections. Artists, Crtalic and me, were physicaly detached from the audience, completely deprived of immediate contact with them (and vice versa). From the laptop in our room, we projected a slide show made of photos that we took in past several years and have to do with our relationship. There were elements of surprise for both of us because I took photos that I made and he took his, without earlier consulting and without commenting them previously, so that we wouldn’t affect immediacy of our response to them.
Photos alone, as time cuts, evoked memories of some happenings and hopefully had a therapeutic impact on our relationship. We had microphones and audience was listening to our conversation while we were discussing certain things that provoked us emotionally while watching pictures of us from the past.
Thus, the performance had twofold effect, primariily on two of us becouse we discussed our private conflicts in front of unknown audience, like in front of some kind of jury, followed by artefacts and evidence materials that were supposed to resolve them; and secondarily it ’tought’ audience to watch the performance without the performers. It was an attempt of avoiding direct denudation (as mere presence of artist’s figure in his/her work is, or his/her nakedness) that is usually connected with
performance art, and to give to that nakedness (that is actually immanet to every honest work of art) a more subtle form, exposing only the lovers discourse to immediacy of that mediia and depriving the audience of theatre and choreography.
Third side of the story was recording the performance with video camera, which document the documented, and thus closed those memories in a sintagm of ever repeating experience that is threatening to become a symbolic one.
Photos are pharaphrasing the silent movie media, in which case it is not only silent but also moveless, and who are later breath into life by comments and by act of performance itself, usually the fictive one-the time elipse was executed.
Oxymoron that ineviteably occures in this process, shows enthrophy that is happening when memories and feelings are pro-e-voked by dead pieces of present time (called past), pieces that are obvously modeling our current moods, relationships and behaviours, all of them as realistic as mere photographic facts are.
